Fish: "You cannot see the tears in my eyes because I am in the water."
Water: "I can feel your tears because you are in my heart."
The love in the human world is nothing more than the emotions between fish and water.
In late October in Luoyang, the sky was clear and bright, cool and comfortable, with a lingering hint of osmanthus fragrance in the air. In the back kitchen of Li Siniang's home, Xing Ruyi selected two crucian carp from the water tank, gutted them, scaled them, and removed their gills before washing them clean and marinating them lightly with salt and cooking wine.
Li Siniang watched from the side, praising her while explaining, "I never expected that someone would come to my shop to order crucian carp soup at this time. I thought about declining, but that person is someone I know and a pitiful one at that, so my heart just couldn't bear to turn them away. You know, I, Li Siniang, can make wine well enough, but cooking is really not my strong suit. Thankfully, Fox Demon, you can do it; otherwise, I wouldn't be able to serve this dish."
"How could it be as serious as you say, Si Niang? I'm just like you; I can only mix some rouge and cook a bit," Xing Ruyi replied while continuing her work without any delay. She cut the tofu into 1-centimeter thick pieces, heated a cast iron pot, added a small amount of oil, and placed the crucian carp inside. In no time at all, both sides turned golden brown.
Li Siniang grabbed a handful of scallions and handed them to Xing Ruyi. "Who are you kidding, Xing Ruyi? You only mix some rouge and cook a little? I know you also treat illnesses and exorcise evil spirits. In short, you are one of the most remarkable and mysterious young women in this world."
"Even if I'm remarkable, I'm still your Si Niang's partner. You brought me here as a long-term worker to cook for you," Xing Ruyi laughed as she chopped the scallions finely and sprinkled them over the fish. She added some ginger and about five bowls of water before covering it with a lid to simmer.
As the sizzling sounds filled the air, the aroma of food began to waft around. Lingling inhaled deeply with anticipation and shook Fox Demon's arm. "Lingling wants to eat too!"
"Alright, I'll have your sister make something for you later!" Xing Ruyi teased Lingling by rubbing her nose before ladling out the finished crucian carp tofu soup and handing it to Li Siniang. "Okay, go serve it to that customer!"
Li Siniang nodded and took the crucian carp soup to the front hall. Xing Ruyi washed her hands and followed her to see who had ordered this dish. Although simple, this dish held great significance. The pure white tofu symbolized the pure and flawless love between men and women, while the two fish playing in the water represented joy between them. Drinking this soup on an appropriate occasion could indeed convey a sense of romance.
In the front hall, in a corner sat an elderly woman. Judging by her appearance, she seemed to be in her sixties or seventies; however, people in ancient times often looked older than they were—she might actually be just over forty or not yet fifty. Next to her stood a young man in his twenties with striking features and an air of righteousness about him; judging by their interaction, they appeared to be mother and son. This crucian carp soup was ordered by the elderly woman.
Xing Ruyi had initially thought that whoever ordered this dish would at least be a sentimental young couple; thus she felt somewhat disappointed upon seeing the elderly woman. However, just as she was about to turn around and head back to the kitchen, she caught sight of what seemed like a shadow faintly following behind the old woman.
In the ear, the conversation between the old woman and Li Siniang could be heard: "Thank you, Si Niang. I know my request is indeed a bit excessive, but over twenty years ago, I was here and had this dish. Although it wasn't you, Si Niang, who cooked back then, and this place wasn't yet a Tavern, I've always held onto that memory in my heart."
"The old lady need not worry. Si Niang has heard that before you, there were two previous owners here. The first was a rice merchant who later faced famine and war, causing the shop to close down, which led to it being handed over to the second owner. This second owner was a couple who fished; the husband was skilled at catching fish and cooking them. They transformed the rice shop into a fish restaurant, selling both fish and fish-related dishes, and their business thrived. My parents were regulars here when they were young."
"Yes, yes, business was very good back then." The old woman squinted her eyes as if lost in thought. "That man was very skilled at fishing and cooking; whether it was big fish or small fish, he could turn them into all sorts of delicious dishes. I have never seen such nimble hands or such clever thoughts."
"And what happened later?" Li Siniang subtly sensed something and cautiously asked, but saw the old woman bow her head in silence.
"Please don't blame Si Niang; my mother has been like this lately." The young man cupped his hands and took the fish from Si Niang's hands. He personally served a bowl of it in front of the old woman. "Mother, try this and see if it tastes like what you remember."
The old woman nodded and took a bite, tears streaming down her face.
"Mother, did something burn you?" The young man asked nervously.
The old woman shook her head and stood up. "Xian'er, let’s go home! Thank you, Si Niang; this fish is delicious, but no matter how good it is, it can never compare to what that person made."
"Si Niang understands!" Li Siniang said as she accepted the silver coins handed over by the young man and stepped aside to make way for the old woman and her son.
Lingling watched from the side, puffing up her cheeks in anger. "What’s going on with these two? They came early in the morning just to eat fish. My sister said we only sell wine here at the Tavern and don’t serve fish, yet they refuse to leave and even offered a large sum of silver just to eat here. My sister couldn’t refuse them; seeing how pitiful that old woman looked, she reluctantly agreed and called Sister Ruyi over. In the end, after all that effort, she only took one bite before getting up to leave. What does that even mean?"
"If I’m not mistaken, this old woman is the former owner of this Tavern—the fish restaurant your sister mentioned. She didn’t come here just to eat fish; she came for memories of her youth. No matter how good your Sister Ruyi's cooking is, it can never replicate the taste made by someone dear to her heart. So Lingling, don’t be upset!"
"That’s right!" Li Siniang added as she walked over. "When they first arrived this morning, I was initially against it because they didn’t look like people who couldn’t afford fish; there are plenty of places to eat in Luoyang. However, that young man privately spoke with me; although he wasn’t very clear about it, he hinted that this was his mother’s old home. Coupled with what the old lady just said, it’s almost certain that she is indeed the former mistress of that fish restaurant."
"Is that fish restaurant really so special? They moved away long ago; why come back after all these years just to eat fish?" Lingling was still young and viewed things superficially without understanding much. However, as Xing Ruyi and Li Siniang exchanged glances, they both understood each other perfectly.
Lingdang looked at herself and smiled, shaking her head. "Actually, I'm not very clear on the specifics either. I just often heard my parents lamenting during my childhood that this perfectly good fish restaurant was gone. As they talked more, I naturally heard more, and gradually pieced together a vague outline of the story."
"Sister-in-law, hurry!" Lingdang, eager to hear a story, busily brought over two stools. At this time, it was still early, and there weren't many customers coming to buy wine, so Li Siniang decided to share the story she had heard in her childhood.
"Well, this happened twenty years ago. At that time, the fish restaurant was thriving. One reason was that the couple running it were kind-hearted and charged low prices. You all know that the people living around here are mostly poor families who can't save much silver throughout the year, so delicious and inexpensive meals naturally made people happy. The second reason was that the fish served at the restaurant was exceptionally tasty, so much so that my parents remembered it fondly for many years. Of course, I never got to try it since my parents went away long ago; otherwise, I could have let them taste whether it was you, Fox Demon, who cooked better or that couple."
"Why are you dragging me into this?" Xing Ruyi propped her chin up. "As they say, people eat to fill their stomachs; we eat just to satisfy our hunger. Wealthy families seek novelty and flavor, while those older folks eat for nostalgia. Even if I cook well, it can't compare to the happiness of those past experiences."
"That's true. Like me, I always think about the persimmons on the tree at my family's door; they seemed incredibly sweet. But a few days ago, I went back and picked some. They were sweet enough, but somehow they didn't taste quite right; they didn't seem as delicious as before," Li Siniang shook her head.
"Sister-in-law, let's get back to the story about the fish restaurant!" Lingdang urged eagerly, her eyes sparkling with curiosity.
"My parents said that when the fish restaurant had been open for almost a year, two significant events occurred. One was that the innkeeper's wife became pregnant—a joyous occasion—so the innkeeper even gave away some fish in celebration. The second event happened shortly after the giveaway: a fire broke out at the restaurant one night, destroying everything in an instant. The innkeeper's wife—who might be that old woman we just saw—was out shopping at the time and thus escaped unharmed; however, the fate of the innkeeper remains unknown. Some people claimed they saw him leave before the fire started and he wasn't inside; others said he was trapped inside and burned to death; there were even rumors that he eloped with a woman taking all their silver with him. In any case, it became a mystery that circulated for many years."
"A mystery?"
"Yes, a mystery because at that time, the Government Office did not find the innkeeper's body among the ruins of the burned restaurant. But all of this is just hearsay; I doubt anyone remembers exactly how it went now." Li Siniang added another detail: "There was also a third event shortly after the fire—the innkeeper's wife remarried. Who she married and where she went is also a secret; no one knows."
"A mystery and a secret! It seems like there’s quite a story behind the fish restaurant fire from twenty years ago!" Xing Ruyi sighed and suddenly thought of the shadow following the old woman—could it be that he was the innkeeper from back then, her former husband?
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