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墨書 Inktalez
"Little sister, I can't go on living. Damn it, he gets drunk and hits me, and when he's unhappy, he hits me too. I don't even have money for the fare to come back. Tonight, he called me over after drinking, didn't say a word, and just beat me up. I'm by the river now, and soon I'll jump in. I can't take it anymore."
I called my mother.
"I'm done for; a useless person is going to be beaten to death by others."
"You call your third uncle and ask him to find out what's going on. He said he was going to jump into the river right in front of me. As an older brother, how can he be so out of his mind?"
"Did your cousin just beat up the second brother for nothing?" My dad quickly interjected.
"Wait, I'm going to buy a ticket. I'm heading straight to Xinjiang; I'll stab him."
"You can go, but first of all, you might not even be able to get there. Even if you do, he's working there. You're unfamiliar with the place; what can you do? Your son is in a life-and-death situation, and you want to stab someone else? This whole family will be finished, and his two kids will be left without anyone to care for them."
"What am I supposed to do? Are you saying my second brother should just take the beating?" My dad was shouting on the other end of the line.
"What can you do? Hurry up and get someone back home; focus on your own business instead of running around outside." I felt utterly drained; every conversation with parents who had such different views consumed a lot of my energy.
Listening to my parents arguing on the phone made my heart feel like a tangled mess.
I hung up and looked out at the dark night sky as silent tears streamed down my face.
Later, money was sent from home, and the second brother quietly returned home. As for me, I lost the need to stay in touch.
My mother first said that my second brother bought a house but couldn't pay the mortgage, so he went to Xinjiang to earn money. Then she mentioned that he lost three hundred thousand while partnering with someone in business before finally saying that he lost over thirty thousand gambling at a gathering with acquaintances. The specifics of what really happened might only be known to them.
On the sixteenth day of the Lunar New Year, my husband had to go to B City for work and would pass through Decheng. My mother and Aunt wanted to go to my third uncle's house and asked for a ride. I felt resistant inside; there was an ominous premonition urging me to avoid it.
My cousin called me several times, but I didn't want to answer since he had previously beaten up my second brother pretty badly, leaving a bad impression on me. However, out of respect for my mother, I eventually picked up.
"Jing Jing, my aunt and little aunt said they are taking your car to Decheng. Let me know when they leave."
"Okay, I'll tell you when we set off." The first call was rather mundane; if I had known about the storm that would follow mixed with my heartbreak, I should have deleted his number immediately.
But fate seemed to have already laid its traps, forcing me to confront this storm.
The next day, my husband packed his things and set off with my mother and Aunt. Watching them leave reminded me of a dream I had that night; in a hazy state, a voice told me: "You are not your parents' biological child..." The dream ended abruptly, but I vaguely felt that voice belonged to my cousin.
Around four o'clock in the afternoon, my cousin called again.
"Jing Jing, have you and your little aunt set off? Where are you now?"
"They've already left; it's been almost four hours."
"You... you didn't take the child over there? I thought you were going too."
"No, I'm staying here. The child has to go to school."
My cousin was silent for a moment on the other end of the phone, then said softly, "Jing Jing, there are actually some things I want to tell you. There are many things you don't know. My aunt favors you over my second brother, and she even blames me for hitting him."
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